Melancholic Cinderella

Title: Melancholic Cinderella

Author: by Sushi

URL: http://www.winglin.net/fanfic/M_C/

Reviewed by: Lamer_

Title = 9.5/10

Unique yet beautifully name.. It's giving off the right kind of theme which you want to portray out for your story.. However, i felt Cinderella reveal a little much for the story itself..

Poster & Background = 7.5/10

Seriously.. I couldn't bear mark down on this part.. As i love the poster very much.. The theme was right for the story and the colour fonts fit well with the poster.. The poster was pleasing to the eyes.. However.. I fell that the background somehow doesn't really match with the poster.. If your background have some effect of what you had in the poster, i believe it will prefectly match well.. :) No offend, just a penny of my thoughs..

Foreword = 8.5/10

Beautifully Written.. One thing i like about the foreword is the short paragraph written.. That was a really captivating and nice start for your story at the foreword.. You manage to attracted my attention and made me wanted to read on the story with the intersting short paragraph.. I like the way you present it and inserting the small paragraph of Cinderella story into the main and create a fairytale effect for rainie imagination.. Your clearly state out your casting in a neat form.. Giving enough information about the story which will hooks on people to read on, yet, they are just not too much being reveal out for the whole..

Cast = 4/5

I love your casting.. No bias-ness.. I can characterizations in the story for the few cast used in the story.. That was a good job done.. So i mark on your effort for characterizations too.. :)

Originality & Creativity = 12.5 /15

Well.. To be honest.. I really believe your story truthly stand out for it originality and creativity part.. As i read on, I couldn't really link to any kind of story plot out there in winglin which mades me glad about it.. You insert quite a few original and creative idea into the story.. Like, the ending part, it really surprise me how you twist the whole story like that and made it looks like the Jiro is the so call 'bad' guy whom 'rape' Rainie..
Plot = 13/15

I love your plot for this story.. The prince charming part is like a fairytale for everyone and i like how you portray it out for Rainie.. The idea are all neatly elaborate out and well organised.. The realtionship for each and every characters are wisely planned and the sparks among them are well created.. Good job.. :)

Language (Spelling & Grammar) = 9/10

Not bad.. Hardly found any.. Only some small ones.. But overall it’s good.. :)

Flow Of The Story: 7.5/10

The story is smooth.. The pace was just right.. My little complain is the ending 2 chapter.. You rush everything up and made rainie forget about everything, only remember her great times with her prince, and forget about what happen after that.. It was rather, confusing about how she got the idea that it was Jiro whom 'rape' her.. The pace there was a little too rush when you sum everything like that.. Making me feel sad about Jiro being wrong by rainie, yet, I quite pity Rainie in it..

Writing Style: 3.5/5

I like the way you write your story.. Clean and clear.. Easy to follow.. Good job.. :) I'm rather comfortable with it.. :)

Overall enjoyment = 8.5/10

I enjoy every moment reading the story.. The twist at the end really surprise me a lot.. I also like the way you plan and write your story.. Good Job.. :)

Bonus Mark: 3/5
Marks for effort of replying your reader.. And effort for writting the story.. :)

Total: 86.5

Additional Comment:

This is an rather un-expected ending story to me.. I enjoy every moment reading it.. Great job.. Continue the good job on.. :) I just love the ending so much.. :)

Reviewed By Lamer_@Midnight-tree.co.nr