Generation X

Title: Generation X
Author: Jeong Eun-hoon
URL: http://www.winglin.net/fanfic/generationx/
Reviewed by: shattered tearsdrop


Disclaimer/Warning: Okay, first and foremost, I have to warn the author that I am a very strict and specific reviewer. I tend to point out specific mistakes in the fic which I think can be improved/changed/edited. I do not know that author and neither does the author know me so I don’t favor nor abhor him/her in any way. May the author be assured that I am doing my best to help him/her and not to degrade him/her in any way.



Title: 4/10

~ Okay, basically, when I read your title, I sort of had the idea that maybe your fic was a sci-fi one because the title certainly sounded like one. You know like Generation Y and whatever generation. But when I read your forewords, it was then that the title became clear. The ‘X’ is actually the Roman numeral for ‘ten’, meaning Generation 10 or tenth generation. Now, the title is actually a bit misleading and I’m sure most of the readers also misunderstood this point. I do hope you could change it to a more creative one. It is also not that appealing and a bit unattractive. I gave out the points for the obvious relation of the title to the story.



Poster & Background: 5/10

~ The poster is nice, yes, but I feel that it is lacking. It doesn’t even show reference or relation to the story, except for Kim Eun Jung’s pictures which obviously showed that she’s a model. Also, I would have preferred if you had bigger pictures of the main artists. As for the background, it allows the poster to stand out and it does not disrupt my reading, so points for that.



Forewords: 4/10

~ First of all, I’m a spelling/grammar freak. I was quite a bit disappointed when I found several typographical errors on your forewords alone. I mean, at least do some proof-reading before posting up a chapter, or for this instance, your forewords. Apart from spelling, your forewords already revealed a lot about your plot which obviously spoils everything. I think you should leave out a bit of the details.

The character profiles were straight and direct to the point. I think you could have done it in a more creative way but it’s just fine as it is. It’s better than nothing, right?



Cast Used: 3/5

~ I know Rain and Kim Eun-jung. I am familiar with them but I am neither a fan nor a hater so I’m pretty much in between. With only two chapters, I can’t really judge if I like their character or not. They seem to instantly hate each other the moment they met. I can only guess that it’s because of the arranged marriage. I haven’t read much conflict and backgrounds on both characters because your story has only two chapters so far, so I can’t rate your effectiveness in characterization. The points were given because I appreciate how you portrayed them instantly hating each other despite the unfamiliarity between them.



Originality & Creativity: 5/15

~ To put it bluntly, your plot is cliché. It’s overused and definitely cliché. I’ve already encountered stories about arranged marriages and I can only guess how many stories there are in Winglin with the same plot. I can’t really say whether your story is creative or not because again, it has only two chapters. And those chapters only described how they met, what they thought of each other and finally, when they were informed that they were going to live with each other. I can’t really judge because these situations are… hmmm… shall I say, basically overused? Points were for effort.



Story & Plotting: 5/15

~ Story-wise, again, I can’t judge because it’s just starting out. I suggest you write up more chapters first and then maybe ask for another review if you’ve written solid chapters with different and more complex conflicts and situations. Plot-wise, it’s cliché. Case closed. Points were for effort.



Spelling/Grammar/Vocabulary: 7/10

~ As I’ve said, I’m a spelling/grammar freak. You have a serious case of typographical errors. Grammar-wise, I think it’s a so-so. You are consistent in using the past tense in your chapters so I think that deserves points. Vocabulary-wise, you have a passable command of the English language so I don’t have any problem at all.



Flow of the Story: 4/10

~ Cliché is only equal to predictable. I’m guessing that their hatred for each other sprung from the fact that they both did not like being in an arranged marriage. Also, I think they will keep bickering with each other until they unconsciously find out that they’ve actually fallen for each other already. Then, of course, there will be the entrance of a third character, one that will complete a love triangle and brew up some jealousy. Other times, there will two additional characters which will want to break the main couple apart. Did I tell you that your story reminded me of Rain’s Full House series?



Writing Style: 2/5

~ As much as I am not a fan of one-liner paragraphs, I am also not a fan of cramped up paragraphs with no spaces in between. Your chapters seriously need some editing. Some spaces between paragraphs won’t hurt. You know what are the implications of having no spaces between paragraphs? It makes the whole chapter look crowded and cramped. It’s not fun to read it like that. Points were for effort. Another thing, I appreciate it that you wrote your chapter titles in Korean, but in doing so, you did not give chance to the readers who do not read Korean scripts to understand what the chapter titles mean. I also appreciate it that you placed some Korean terms (e.g. Kyiyoum) but I think you could have placed translations either at the top or at the bottom of your chapter in order to make non-Korean readers understand what those terms meant.



Overall Enjoyment: 3/10

~ The length of your story made it difficult for me to judge whether I have enjoyed it or not. But if I were to judge according to what I’ve read so far, I would have to say, I did not. The plot is cliché and overused. The story is predictable. What’s there to enjoy? Points were again, for effort. I’m not that cruel, you know.



Bonus Marks: 4/5

~ You reply to your readers and you listen to their suggestions. These definitely deserve points.



Total Mark: 46/100



Personal Remarks:

~ I know it’s not that high but I feel you could do a lot more of improvements in writing. Don’t lose hope. Strive for improvement.


Reviewed by: shattered teardrops